What is Love? (And My Thoughts on It)
A Thought on Love
"Happiness is more precious than silver. Love is more valuable than gold."
~Matshona Dhliwayo
A timeless question asked again and again with each coming generation: What is the meaning of love?
For thousands of years, we humans have tried to find a simple definition of what love is. Poems, songs, plays, movies, and books have attempted to explain it. Philosophers, scientists, and common folk have tried as well. Is it a chemical or hormonal response? Is it an illusion; a figment of our imaginations?
The truth is that love comes in very many forms, making it quite the challenge to assign just one definition to it.
I just now tried to look up the meaning of the word itself to see what would come up. I didn't want to fill up this blog post by adding all of them, haha...😅 But I think the most fitting definitions were these:
But truly, the most unexpected I came across was this one:
10. (In tennis, squash, and some other sports) a score of zero; nil. 😂
For most of us, romantic love is what comes to mind first, or most often. It can be a thrilling (or nerve-racking) idea to find one's "special someone." But what about loving your best friend? Or your bird, or your brother? That's not romantic, is it?
So there's got to be other types of love... It's just not as widely spoken of. Perhaps part of the reason for that, is it's a very difficult thing to think about or understand, especially for the younger generations (including myself).
Then comes Valentine's Day... every February 14th. It started out as a Pagan celebration known as Lupercalia, a fertility festival for people to come together to find a partner to marry. But at some point, much like what occurred with Christmas/Yuletide, it was combined with a Christian holiday: St. Valentine's Day. It remains unclear who St. Valentine really was, but the Pagan purpose of celebrating romance, love, and the coming of spring prevailed.
[A brief history of the origins of Valentine's Day: https://www.britannica.com/topic/Valentines-Day]
How many of you have at one point called this holiday Valentimes Day? I sure did! 😅
Some folks love the holiday and look forward to it every year, while others hate it and wish to sleep through it. Where do I stand? Well, part of me appreciates that we have a day to acknowledge the ones we love in more ways than just romantic. But we could do that every or any day, could we not?
For the most part, I strongly dislike this holiday. This is solely because I live in a consumerist-driven country that unfairly takes advantage of the day to try and pull money from people's pockets. Whether they've been married for 20 years or dating for 2 months, they feel pressured by the holiday and social norms to do something overly special for their partners. They might buy a metallic, heart-shaped box of chocolates for $20 to be consumed in around 5 to 10 minutes (if they're even good chocolates). Or they might buy roses for an insane amount of money (I checked last time at the store: $50!) for them to wilt a few days later. They don't even have the sweet scent most of the time! Some people would even spend an insane amount of money to go to a fancy restaurant, vacation, or some other event.
It's not only the couples that are affected, though.
In this modern-day era, the "true meaning of Valentine's Day" has been expanded to include friends and family, consequently making almost anyone feel pressured to buy or do something for their loved ones.
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| Is this GIF cringeworthy enough? |
At least, that's how it was when I left Elementary school about 9 years ago. Do schools still do this nowadays? I do not know. Besides the slight sentimentality of the few cards I have kept (mainly from the classmates I liked best), I am reminded of how companies try to drag as much money from us as possible. Even from a very young age, before we even understand why we're doing what we're doing.
Besides all that, every time I go to the store around January and February, I end up getting blinded by various shades of red and pink... No thanks, I'd rather save my vision, and my money, and avoid those aisles entirely!
Fortunately or not, the original intentions of Valentine's Day have been lost somewhere among the heaps of brightly-coloured plastic packaging.
Now I ask... Is all this truly necessary to show our loved ones how much we care about them?
So no, I do not like this holiday. It is overdone and overrated. But... I will admit that it does make for a cute theme in general, especially for blog content.😉
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| Here's another lovely GIF... |
I think it's important to note that I do not hate people for liking this holiday. I am just going against the companies for putting pressure on society to spend more money than they need to. So if you do enjoy this sugary, heart-themed day, then feel free to do so! I am not coming after you. 😊
Also, just because I find Valentine's Day a nuisance doesn't mean that I consider love the same way! I deeply care about my family, friends, animals, plants, the planet, and so, so many more things.
Here are my thoughts on some of the different kinds of love that shouldn’t only be acknowledged one day in the year, but every day. Or most days, at least.
Romantic Love
I thought it only proper to at least briefly touch on this type of love. This is a broad topic, and a lot comes into play. I think that when a pair of people find each other or come together, it can be a very special thing. But romance doesn't always need to be a part of it.
When two people love each other in that special way, they are a team. They support and help each other to grow and become better people. They stick together through the obstacles and challenges that life brings, going through them side by side. And even if something comes up, such as problems, misunderstandings, etc., if their love is true, it will show by holding them together.
Now, I prefer to leave this topic at that since I am no expert and do not want to get too deep into it. Nonetheless, I will share a fun fact: Did you know that unscented roses are more robust than scented ones, which are weaker and wilt sooner?
(Despite knowing that, I still prefer the scented ones).
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| A random GIF from somewhere. |
Love for Our Animals
Many of us love our animals. Our dogs, cats, guinea pigs, fish, you name it, are like family to us. It's a heart-warming example of symbiosis. (Symbiosis is a term describing any relationship or interaction between two dissimilar organisms). We give them food, water, and protection (as best as we can), and they give us good laughs, crazy stories, a listening ear, a comforting cuddle, and even a reason to live.
Do animals actually experience love the way we do? Perhaps yes, perhaps no. I cannot answer this question. I have known many animals to show affection though, some more intensely than others... so I reckon that animals, like people, experience "love" in different ways.
Whether they're service animals, emotional support pets, or a loyal companion, we can all agree that they leave pawprints (or whatever markings snakes/fish/etc. make) behind in our lives and our hearts.
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| A Cute GIF |
Love for Our Family and Friends
No family is perfect, but we love those whom we have a good bond with. We can't choose the family we are born into, but you don't have to be blood-related or share DNA to "love someone like family."
Friendships come in many forms: in-person and long-distance, short-term and lifelong. Some friendships grow into more while most remain platonic. Throughout our lives, we'll meet friends who come and go from our lives, but others remain steadfast. Sometimes we'll find a new friendship when we least expect it, and you don't know where it could lead.
Oftentimes with our best friends, we come to a point where we say we love them. (Platonically, of course). Sometimes those best friends will be like family to us, such as our "sister," "brother," "aunt," etc. That's one of those special things in life, that one can find family in good friends.
There's a saying I've heard several times, where if you are close friends with someone for 7 years, you'll remain friends for the rest of your lives. How true this is I don't yet know, but I believe that different circumstances would come into play and change the number of years. Would the saying remain true for best friends who spend almost every day together compared to those who only see each other twice a year, but when they meet it seems as if no time has passed at all?
I'd say those who share many interests and viewpoints, experience new things together, show equal commitment, and help each other through rough patches, are considered the best of friends, whether it's a long-distance friendship or not. Even if they don't see each other daily or drift apart for a time, life (and love) has a way of bringing them back together.
These are my two favourite friendship quotes:
"A best friend is like a four-leafed clover: Hard to find, lucky to have."
"Good friends make every day better. Good friends stay in our hearts forever."
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| NCIS GIF |
The Love We Have for Material Things or Ideas
We are capable of loving anything, whether it be a material object or a breathing being. Some love money, others the planet. Some of us love books to the point where we couldn't live without them. Some of us love art and/or music as much as life. Some of us love nature and feel a deep appreciation for it. We can love stories and characters, even if they aren't "real." The list goes on and on.
For some of us, we love our hobbies so much so, that they become our life's purpose.
This is a rather difficult type of love for me to explain... but I am hoping that perhaps some of you will know what I mean.
Here is a song that my mother showed me when we were having a conversation about the different kinds of love. I figured it would fit well with this topic.
[Music (Was My First Love) by John Miles]
Self-Love
No, I don't mean being selfish or narcissistic. It's important to like and appreciate ourselves. Otherwise, we won't feel well or confident in our being. After all, how could we love someone or something else, if we don't love ourselves (first)?
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| By loving ourselves we can grow into better people. |
Love is different for everyone.
Everyone has a different viewpoint on life and different experiences, so there are many different answers. One of the singers I've grown up with is John Denver, and he wrote a song about the various answers people gave to what they think love could be. When I was younger, I thought the song was boring. I can appreciate it better now that I'm older, and I thought it was perfect to conclude this post with that song.
[Perhaps Love by John Denver]
As for the inquiry of what love really is, only one thing seems certain: It's a question that still seeks many answers!
What does love mean to you?
What are your opinions about Valentine's Day?
What do the Elementary/Middle/High Schools do nowadays on Valentine's Day?
"Love is just love. It can never be explained." ~James Earl Jones
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